Drop the Obligationships

three legged pic

When I was seven years old, I kicked a girl in the shin in the schoolyard. My leather-soled Oxford shoes cut right through her navy tights.

She wasn’t nice to me. She was downright mean. So I decided not to be nice to her. With my foot.

We invited each other to birthday parties when that was the thing you did. We were lab partners in biology junior year. We managed to avoid each other when we attended the same university. She was always a little snarky to me; I was always a bit scared of her.

Yet, somehow, we were Facebook friends up until two weeks ago.

I pulled the plug. Not just on this one contact, but close to 50 other Facebook friends. The decision to sever ties was easy after THIS happened:

I was asked, “What is the one thing that you need to STOP doing to really put your writing out there in the world?” 

The answer didn’t come in the form of words. Instead, it was the face of the girl in the schoolyard. I need to STOP putting energy out to her and other people who aren’t really my friends.

My Facebook PSA talking points:

  • Just because you know someone for a long time doesn’t mean that you need to keep tabs on them (or vice versa). Life is not a three-legged race.
  • Sense of obligation and fear of insulting someone are not (good) reasons to be friends.
  • It’s OK to never talk to someone again or see their face (aka photo) if the connection with them is not, or is no longer, a positive one.
  • If you don’t get a warm and fuzzy when thinking about a person knowing about your life, then they are not a friend, Facebook or otherwise.

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